Total girl moment

OK I am going to take a moment and be a complete girly girl. I know, very annoying, I try to keep those moments to a minimum but this really is for a good reason. The other day the weather was so nice I decided to pull out some summer clothes. In going through the box I found an outfit that was really cute but I had only worn once before. Not because I didn't like it but because my ass seemed to exceed the limits of the fabric shortly after making my purchase. I decided to give it a try, I have lost some weight and see how it looked. Holding my breath, I slowly slide them up and begin to suck in my gut to button them. Only to realize I didn't have to suck anything in. OMG! Not only do I not have to suck anything in but they are big, big like I have to wear a belt!! In my excitement I jerk them off to look at the tag, I must know what size they are. Are you ready?? They are a 9! I haven't seen below a size 9 since before my son was born. I am beside my self not wanting to believe what I am seeing. So what do I do? What any normal girl would do and attempt to shake myself back to reality. This is a fluke, a mistake. I pull out the dreaded bikini. I put it on to reassure myself that I am crazy and not really below a 9. Sadistic, I know. Well guess what...It's loose. I don't believe I will have a risk of being harpooned this year. Hell I might actually wear it in front of people.